Monday, 17 October 2011

Having no reason to stay is the best reason to leave.

For the last 3 years, I've been a fool by running into you, wanted to make you thought me as your friend. I mean a good friend.  Now I know I've been a fool , thinking you could be the perfect person for me. Pffttt.  But, I know I'm wrong. I made mistake. So that, I think I've made the best decision ; forgetting you. Not to be pretend. 

I miss you. I kind of miss you, not as I miss you, I like you. But I miss talking to you like all everyday. Sometimes, spilling our emotions talking about our problems, and care about other people, everything. It's just that, I miss when we used to share, now it's like we don't know each other anymore and it kind of hurts. It hurts knowing we've grown apart and it went by so quickly. And it much hurts knowing you, I just can't tell you this.

Here, memories can be painful.

You can't change them and no matter how hard you try, if they really matter to you, you just can't forget them. Like I wanna beat myself up about it but I can't because whats done is done. The only thing you can really do about it is move on from it. Yet, memories can also be good for me. Because at least I know that it is possible to be that happy and maybe someday I will get that happiness back. Here, the memories is matter so that when it's all over, you can remember the good times.

And. I'm not the second option.

So here I tell you, I've decided to build a strong wall around my heart. Since I'm going to face SPM which is just about a months from now, I just really need to focus on my studies. Can't deny that I still have that strong feelings, but I won't let it affect any single thing in my life. And please, I hope the feelings will fade as soon as possible. Again, mark my words, people.

However, happy birthday to you. I'm sorry I didn't sent any text-wish to you. It's not that I don't remember, but just I don't want. Again, happy birthday. Seeing you happy, is much hurts me.

Notes : Perhaps one day, the guy that is willing to break this strong and tough wall I've build will be worth the wait.